Saturday, August 13, 2011

Summer Moved On

So, even though i'm used to writing only from September to June, this year it feels different.

So I decided to check in and just write a little bit. First of all, if you haven't seen Dennis Rodman's speech last night, while being inducted into the hall of fame, watch it.

Really touching and special, he cried a little bit and I admit I also got a little emotional. Also always regarded him as a great player and a great character, what he has done, not many could do. Being a player that cares about the team and to be focused on what he does, without wanting to score and to shoot all the time, that doesn't happen too much.

As for me, I'm doing ok, getting over my summer crush and besides checking his profile on Facebook from time to time, I'm feeling better. Maybe being busy with the up coming season is helping me focus on other issues rather then thinking about him and what could have been.

Now that most of my day is focused on basketball I don't find a lot of me time, time that I can think and can just doze off and think about other things but basketball, but when that happens, I still think about the summer and how much fun I had with him.

I know that I can take a lot of positive things from all that happened in the summer, that it gave me the belief that good things can happen to me, regarding my personal life that is. I was hurt, but not by someones behavior, but I was just hurt from life itself.

It might not sound so different, but for me to know that I can experience all those beautiful things and to know that what happened doesn't have to do with the guy I liked and spent my time with is a lot for me.

In a sense I think that I miss what he represented as much as I miss him. I mean, cuddling, enjoying walking the street with someone I care for, going out, catching a movie, and basically just living.

I know now more than ever that I will come out, and not when I'm gray and old, but earlier, not that i'm judging anyone else, but I just know what's good for me and what I want.

I'm excited to feel this way, because it shows me that i'm accepting myself more and more with everyday that goes by. I still wish I had more time this summer and could enjoy myself more, but that's life for now, and after last summer it changed.

It showed me the good and the bad, but most of all it gave me hope, and that's the best thing I could have wished for. All this might sounds a little naive or simple, but it's just the way I feel at the moment.

So soon enough I will go about another season of basketball, a season I really am looking forward to, a season that I feel good about, after working hard this summer and feeling and knowing that the best is still to come.

When I think about it, i'm sure the best has not yet arrived, not only in basketball, but will take it a step at a time.


  1. I'm gray and I haven't had the nerve to come out. I think you should do it. I believe you will live a much happier and less stressful life. Glad you are getting a chance to experiment. Good luck!!

  2. I'm not gray but I could be. Same as what Drew said. Rooting for you.

  3. I'm gray and gay and have come out, not that that's anything to brag about. It just is. In due time.

    By the way, with the walkout and all, do you think you'll be playing against some NBA'ers this fall. That just might jack up the level of your game, uh?

  4. Good blog. I've been out since I was 25 (now 42). Have been with lots of guys, including my bf of 16 years. We'll probably be together forever, even though he may not be "the one" (and frankly, we're both too old to start other long term relationships). I'm fine with how my life and relationship turned out and I don't regret my choices.

    But you'd be foolish (or awfully lucky) to think that you'll have many opportunities to meet your next "perfect partner" and he'll be magically waiting for you when you choose. You may go through life and never meet someone with as strong a connection and end up settling for second best. Which is fine.. and isn't necessarily so bad. But then you'll always wonder "what if..."