Thursday, December 22, 2011

Holiday Season

Hey everyone, guess this is a good time to wish everyone a merry Christmas since we are only a couple of days away.

The holidays always make me think about families and spending time with our loved ones. I feel blessed with the family I have and I wouldn't trade them for the world, but sometimes it gets lonelier during the holidays, just thinking about someone from the past or someone that I would like to have in my future.

I wrote in my last blog about the birthday of the guy I met in the summer. I decided to write a short happy birthday on facebook, I wasn't sure if I would get a response and I haven't gotten one yet, but it's still middle of the day back in the good old U.S.A, even though I don't think I will hear from him.

I think about him from time to time, not too much, it would be nice to get to know him more, but that's life at the moment I guess and I’m sure that there will be more guys in the future.

I think about a daily routine of having a BF, even though I don't really know what to expect or to think it's something that I look forward to, just like every normal person does I guess. It's weird that most of my thoughts focus on my vacation during the summer and the short time that I have there.

I feel that sometimes I don't really grasp the notion that once I will be out, and it will happen at some point, vacation will be just something different, maybe site seeing, maybe some partying and fun, but it won't be where my focus will be.

I mean, at that point I will have a normal life, I would be able to date all year long, go to parties, enjoy myself and just live my life, no need for a special vacation, off season or anything of the sorts.

I do know that I really have no clue about relationships and anything of that matter and that I will have to find out on the go what's the things I want in a relationship and what the things I can handle are, and what things I can't.

I mean, on paper everything sounds good or bad, black or white, but until we or I in this case don't really experience it, I won't be able to tell. I feel this day is closing in on me and I know in my heart that it's all a matter of time.

On the other hand I'm really happy with basketball now, I just got a glimpse of how much I love this game lately, I think I fell in love with it again. I feel great and I just want to play all the time, practice all the time, lift weights all the time, whatever is needed.

Every year that goes by I get older, just like every person on this planet, well except Benjamin Button, the thing is I feel no difference with my body, I feel great and in shape, so maybe that also means that there are a lot of basketball years ahead of me, I doubt if I would stay in the closet for all of them, so It might get interesting.

Sunday the N.B.A season starts, it will be a nice addition to my life and I know that it will also be nice for a lot of the players playing overseas that always enjoy the chance to watch some basketball from back home.

Well, again merry Christmas and happy holidays to anyone celebrating any other holidays.

All the best and will meet again before 2012 greets us.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Fans and Teammates

Hey everyone,

Hope all is well, for me things are pretty easy going, nothing special going on. I always wish something special will happen so I have more to write to you, but I guess it's not always the case.

In the last months I have been reading more gay websites, more articles, more video's for LGBT rights and so on, it gives me a better picture and insight to the things that happen in the world and in the community.

A lot of times I get a good feeling from reading about the LGBT youth and the things that they are able to do, like coming out, supporting others, trying to make a difference and helping out. Of course there is bullying and there are a lot of problems, especially with the gay youth, but they have courage that I don't think was around in the late 90's and early 2000's.

I think the internet has a lot to do with everything, giving kids more options to read, and learn about themselves and others, to meet teenagers like them and to be able to share some things with others, something that wasn't really around as much when I was growing up, even though it wasn't that long ago.

I don't really know how it is to live in that world; a world of a gay person that just goes on about his life has his straight friends and gay friends and just lives his life. I mean that's an environment that I don't know and never been a part of, my environment is basketball players, fans and people that work around basketball.

It's funny, I never feel a part of it, not just because the locker room chat is about women most of the time, what never really gives me an opportunity to join the conversation, both because I know nothing about it and have no interest to talk about it, but also because I feel that it's talks that are more suitable for 17 year olds and not people around my age, but they always say that pro athletes are just like little babies, so maybe they are mostly right.

I have been thinking lately about the reaction of fans, if they knew or if I were to come out, I wrote about this before, the fans overseas are more college fans than N.B.A ones. They go crazy in games, they curse, shout and have no boundaries, not all of them, but a lot of them.

I have been around a lot of teams and a lot of fans and while I know that most of the fans of teams I will play against will have a lot to say and I would have just to deal with it, I often wonder how the fans of my own team will react. I mean of course it depends how long I have played there and of course the relationship I have with them, but I don't really know what to think.

I'm sure that a lot will accept it, but also there are some that would have a harder time dealing with it, of course it's all up in the air and I can't really know for sure, but I need something to think about don't I?

Enjoy your weekend and don't forget to get presents for everyone, I don't mind if you want to send me a couple also....

P.S - the guy I met in the summer and really enjoyed myself with has a birthday this week, we haven't spoken since I got back, should I wish him a happy B-Day or just leave it, any suggestions??

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Jonah Mowry - YouTube Clip

Hey everyone,

Hope everyone is doing well, anyone excited from the CBA in the N.B.A and the season starting soon? I have to admit I’m kind of happy, will get a chance to see a couple of former teammates and also it always helps falling asleep late at night when I’m tired.

Also have to admit that I'm happy cause Van Gundy will be back, he is with no doubt my favorite analyst regarding basketball and he always makes me laugh, so that's also kind of nice.

As for me, I’m doing well, nothing special, just been traveling a lot for games lately. Not always fun flying in and out of different countries or cities and sometimes it doesn't really matter where you are, because you basically play and go back home, but that's part of the job.

It also has its nice moments, a big win on the road, being together with teammates that are also friends a lot of the time, just being able to eat all day, LOL, can't always complain.

I guess all of you saw the clip of the boy Jonah Mowry and if you didn't then this is the link:

It's very touching and sad and made me feel really bad. I have talked about if before, but I will say it again, I do have a soft spot for kids and it's hard for me to see someone suffer, especially on the count of being different, in this case gay.

I might relate more to this specific situation because I guess it was hard for me also growing up and in my first years of adulthood. Not because the way I was treated, but the way I treated myself in a sense, or the way I felt about myself.

Now this clip has had almost 7 million hits and it went viral very fast, I read the other day that he posted a different clip a couple of months after showing a different picture and now people are saying that the first video, the one I left the link to is fake.

His mom has stepped up to say that it's not and that it's really the way he felt , I don't know how many people are buying it and how many aren't, but I say : "WHO CARES".

I mean the kid deliverd a message of suffering and pain, a message that so many kids relate to and feel in their young and fragile life. There are so many kids being bullied or being hated for being gay or being different and Jonah delivered their message and their cry, it doesn't really matter in my eyes if it's real or not.

The suffering, the suicide and the heart breaking stories we read about everyday are real and are out there everywhere. Kids can be real cruel to other kids and a lot of the times don't have any boundaries, and just go all out to humiliate others and to make others feel bad because of their own insecurities.

So if 7 million people saw this message the rest isn't relevant, the issue doesn't need to be whether the video is real or not, but whether anyone is doing anything to help young kids, kids in pain and in dark places in their life. It's so sad to hear more and more stories regarding this issue, I don't know what the solution is, even though a lot has to come from education in school and from understanding that being different doesn't make anyone better than you ,but just different.

You can simplify things and compare it to ice cream: some of us like Vanilla, some like Chocolate, some like Peanut better, there are all different tastes and there is a place for every flavor in the store, in our homes and in our hearts. Everyone just needs to focus on the flavor they like and let the others enjoy what they like, without thinking one is better than the other.

I hope that all the LGBT organizations out there can change the picture and help the acceptance of the whole LGBT issue through the country, even if it takes time. I just hope the picture will get brighter for those kids who are suffering through life, because no one, especially not kids deserve to suffer for something that they didn’t even chose.

Enjoy the weekend everyone!!