Thursday, March 18, 2010

Anyone Out There?


I talked in one of my early posts about Gareth Thomas the rugby player that came out, and I mentioned that with so many pro players in so many sports and no gay ones known to the public then it's obvious to everyone that they are in the closet, each one with his own reason and own agenda, of course I'm also one of those same guys.

I was thinking yesterday a little bit about this subject, just on my personal behalf, not a community thing, not for finding someone gay to lead the gay march around the world, but just someone that I could be in touch with, talk to, and get to know.

It's somewhat crazy, they say that one from every fifteen is gay, if we take the minimum approach, and there are around 13-14 players in each team, and god knows how many teams, and still you might know about one gay player and that's also after he retired.

I'm not blaming anyone and not expecting anyone to make a move that I myself cant and wont, but for my own sake, for my well being I wish I could just fined one guy like that. As I wrote before, just to feel I can share my story with someone who has more or less the same story and see what happens from there.

To be honest, it's something that pops into my mind a lot, not during the game, but maybe before when we start talking about the team we are about to face, or just when I see other teams play on TV, I say to myself that someone around here has go to be in the same situation as me.

It's not like I'm going to start asking every player that I think is a nice guy if he's gay or not, and of course I'm not going to say anything about myself, so that just leaves me thinking and wishing.

Like every work place and where there is a group of adults in a conversation the subject does come up, I have heard rumors about players in different leagues in different places in the world, some I guess are just rumors and some might be reality, I personally don't think that I come up in those conversations, but one can never know.

About others, well, I can say with quite a lot of confidence that in the teams I played for everyone was straight, but maybe I'm just kidding myself or don't have a good enough gay radar. Before I wrote about one out of every fifteen, I think that in pro sports, where you have to go through so much that involves other men, body contact and basically living and breathing each other the number of gays would be smaller, cause it's something that isn't easy and not for everyone.

With that said, I'm sure there are plenty of them out there, and if anyone is reading this blog and just wants to chat I would be more than happy, but I will stay rational and not hope for too many things that won't come true. I doubt that this one will, but then again, what do we have without hope...

My finishing song hits the spot this time, well at least I think it does....

I work hard every day of my life
I work till I ache my bones
At the end I take home my hard earned pay all on my own -
I get down on my knees
And I start to pray
Till the tears run down from my eyes
Lord - somebody - somebody
Can anybody find me - somebody to love?


  1. You bet they are out there, and just as scared as you are about the whole subject.

    Not that I have personal experience, but it's common sense that are an average of one guy per team. Many of them are probably married/on the down low low. Also, re: gaydar, you get better at it the more folks you meet; it makes sense you cannot tell very well now.

    I am sure somewhere, sometime soon, someone like yourself will read this blog and come out to you.

    But think about it, if you ran across another pro player's blog on the same subject, would you take the initiative and chat? Just asking.

    I really wish you luck in your journey around coming out and/or living in the closet however long you need to.

    I for one appreciate you sharing your life with us, just wish we could be of more direct help.

  2. As a huge basketball fan, and a straight man, I just want to let you know that to some of us, all that matters is whether a player can play; and by that, I mean that I wish that the macho culture in the locker rooms & in the media would realize that there are people on the court who are gay, just as they know for sure that people in the team offices & league offices are gay, and that each one of them knows AT LEAST one person who is gay, probably in their own families. Why is this so hard for people to accept?

    I offer this only to say that it must be difficult to put up with every day and that there are those of us who wish that people could accept gay athletes for their athleticism and not make it their business about who you are off the court.

  3. Blessings on your head. You *are* loved.

  4. Queen eh? hey smile man. It only gets better.